Monday, October 15, 2012

31 Days to a Happy Marriage: Day 15: Adultery

Yup, I'm going there.  Adultery is rampant in our society.  And I'm not just talking about full blown sexual adultery.  There's also emotional adultery...when one spouse tries to fulfill emotional needs through someone or something other than God or their husband/wife.  Adultery is dangerous and extremely painful.

Is it possible to even experience a happy marriage after adultery?  Yes!  With God all things are possible!

During the time that most people need the most love and support is when so many people condemn them.  It's the time when compassion is needed most, and it's usually the last thing people get in that situation.

Do you remember the story in the Bible when the woman was caught in adultery and the religious leaders brought her to Jesus so He could "set her straight"?

Do you remember what Jesus' response was?  It was heart warming.

John 8: 1-11

 1-2 Jesus went across to Mount Olives, but he was soon back in the Temple again. Swarms of people came to him. He sat down and taught them.
3-6 The religion scholars and Pharisees led in a woman who had been caught in an act of adultery. They stood her in plain sight of everyone and said, “Teacher, this woman was caught red-handed in the act of adultery. Moses, in the Law, gives orders to stone such persons. What do you say?” They were trying to trap him into saying something incriminating so they could bring charges against him.
6-8 Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger in the dirt. They kept at him, badgering him. He straightened up and said, “The sinless one among you, go first: Throw the stone.” Bending down again, he wrote some more in the dirt.
9-10 Hearing that, they walked away, one after another, beginning with the oldest. The woman was left alone. Jesus stood up and spoke to her. “Woman, where are they? Does no one condemn you?”
11 “No one, Master.”
“Neither do I,” said Jesus. “Go on your way. From now on, don’t sin.”

Jesus' first response to her was non-judgmental, it was non-condemning, and it was peace and life to her.

Overcoming adultery in a marriage is probably one of the hardest things ever.  But, it is possible.  And there can be fullness of life on the other side of it.  Don't condemn yourself if you've been there.  Jesus doesn't.

It can take a lot of time and healing to forgive a spouse who's committed adultery.  If you are the spouse who has committed adultery, you also have to forgive yourself.  You've probably realized and have seen first hand how adultery can destroy a marriage and family.  You've seen how it can put your future in jeopardy.   When you got past the emotional high of adultery and reality hit, you may have even felt condemned.  Just know God's not the one condemning, and He can provide all the answers, time, and healing needed for marriages and families to overcome, whether that means getting divorced or staying married.

This is the best testimony I've ever heard of a married couple that faced adultery and overcame.  Please take the time to watch their story.  You can find more info and resources from Bob & Audrey Meisner's website:

*Find a list with links to the other posts in this series here.*

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