Friday, October 12, 2012

31 Days to a Happy Marriage: Day 12: First Impressions

One thing I learned from my momma is that you have an opportunity to make a first impression with your spouse every single day.  I know that may be a little confusing.  And some of you may be thinking, how can you make a first impression with someone you've already met?  It's pretty do you greet your spouse the first time you see them...whether it be in the morning, on lunch break, or when they come home from work?

I remember as a child when our first Cocker Spaniel, Buddy, died.  Our family was devastated.  We loved him so much.  My momma may not even remember this, but I distinctly remember her saying that one of the reasons she missed him the most was because when she came home from work he was always thrilled to see her and let her know it.  While, on the other hand, her teenage daughters we either busy doing homework, playing on the computer, or doing whatever else to sometimes only barely say, "Hi." to her.

Every time you see your spouse 'for the first time' you have an opportunity to make it grand!

I know there have been a couple of times when Jeremiah has come home from work that the first thing I did was dump all of my day's problems and frustrations on him without even considering what kind of day he's had.  Or, if I had been frustrated with Emery I would hand her over to him with a smug, "It's your turn."   How heartbreaking.  In the same sense, husbands, if your wife is a stay-at-home mom, you can greet her gently and not harp on her if the house isn't spotless, dinner isn't finished, and the kids are still in their pajamas.  Working in or out of the home can be daunting either way.

Many times, this is why spouses don't want to come home.  Deep down in their heart they think, "What kind of attitude will be thrown at me when I walk in the door?"  No one likes to come home to aggression, frustration, or even apathy.

We can really make our marriages happy by greeting each other in love; by simply saying, "Good morning!"; by asking our spouse how their day was before we pour out our day's events; by giving our children an example of how to treat each other...with love and respect.

My momma was awesome at this!  When we were little children she made an effort to greet my dad with love, to let him relax from a hard day's work, and to give him the opportunity to want to come home.  This is a trait most children have naturally.  I know as soon as Emery hears the garage door open, she runs to the top of the stairs giggling and dancing until her daddy walks up the stairs.  It's precious and it makes me that more excited to see 'daddy' come home.

1 Thessalonians 5:26 tells us to,  "Greet all the brethren with a holy kiss."

Let's show our spouse love first thing in the morning and when they come home.  Let's be their biggest fan.  We have an opportunity to love our spouse in the tiniest of ways, but with the biggest rewards.

*Find a list with links to the other posts in this series here.*